bbq peach turkey tenderloins

• turkey tenderloins
• 1 bottle of bbq sauce
• 2 jars baby food, peaches

Combine baby food and prepared bbq sauce. Brush liberally on all sides of turkey and grill until done.

The dish: If you believe the theory of birth order, then Kim and I are doomed. A relationship of the two last born children will spiral out of control as it will seem like no one is in charge, and even the youngest can only take chaos for so long (would it be a bad time to mention that we had zebra cakes for dinner tonight?). I bring this up only because being the youngest child means that you grow up with limited experience in matters like diapers and baby food. I've never had to feed a younger sibling baby food who promptly spit it up or threw it on the floor, so it doesn't mean much more to me than just being that generic mush in the little jar. I wanted to try something new and yet easy with traditional bbq sauce, so I figured I'd give this a try. It gave a really great taste without adding too much artificial flavor or sweetness. Just for kicks I still cut my meat into little pieces and pretended my fork was a locomotive heading toward the tunnel of my mouth, but I do that at least two nights a week, so I don't think there's much of a connection.

unstuffed cabbage

• 1 head of cabbage, chopped
• 2 yellow onions, chopped fine
• 8 cloves of garlic, chopped fine
• 1 yellow pepper, chopped
• 1 orange pepper, chopped
• fresh parsley, chopped fine
• fresh oregano, chopped fine
• red pepper flakes
• 1 large can diced tomatoes
• 1 large can crushed tomatoes
• 1lb ground turkey
• cooked brown rice (take out or instant works fine)

In a swirl of olive oil, saute the garlic and onions over a medium flame for about 5 minutes, or until just browned, then add to crock pot. In same skillet, brown turkey over a medium flame until done. Add all ingredients except rice to your crock pot (remember, we just don't give a damn about generecizing trademarks), cover and cook on low for 6+ hours. Serve over rice.

The dish: Stuffed cabbage is one of those dishes that I'll order out because it's both delicious and a pain in the ass to prepare. Cabbage leaves are more delicate than you'd think and getting the whole mix cooked evenly without burning parts of it is a true art. I'm not sure how I came up with the idea of doing it like this, but you get about 95% of the flavor with about 10% of the work of the original. That and like every other slow cooker recipe you can prepare it in the morning, or even the night before if you're using a crock pot that was made after leg warmers went out of fashion. You can add cheese if you wish, but I think it works well without it. As always, feel free to subsitute dried herbs for fresh ones.

turkey with mixed spring greens and apples on rye

• thin sliced turkey breast (I roasted and sliced my own)
• 1 red delicious apple, slice thin
• mixed greens of your liking
• good quality mustard
• good quality rye bread

Assemble sandwich in this order: bread, mustard, turkey, apple, greens, top piece of bread. My many years in deli work have made me nutty with always making sure that condiments go on the bottom and veggies always go on top. Any greens will work, but if you're near a Hannaford pick up the spring mix with herbs. Likewise, use whatever mustard tickles you, I had some spicy brown Grey Poupon which rocked. I roasted and sliced my own turkey breast, but if your kitchen doesn't look like the inside of a deli any good turkey will work, but I avoid Boar's Head like the plague as their meats are nothing but a celebration of funk and salt.

The dish: I really miss the 90s sometimes. It could just be short term nostalgia but things really seemed so much newer and brighter in the decade that introduced us to cell phones and Chicken Soup for the Soul books. Although one part of the 90s I certainly don't long for anymore is what I like to call Seinfelditis, the tendency in almost any conversation for someone to make some analogy using an episode of the fabled TV show: wow, you like junior mints too? this is just like that time on Seinfeld... In the decade since Jerry has gone the way of the beanie baby and the phenomenon has mostly died out. That is of course until someone finds out I own a deli slicer, and then I always get remember the Seinfeld where Kramer feed the cat with the slicer? I'm not much of a TV person to begin with and the show never struck a chord with me, but the slicer episode is one of the two I've actually seen (the junior mints one being the other) and it was pretty funny, but slightly tragic when Elaine leveled her heel with the blade. Truth be told, the occasional bout of Seinfelditis is a small price to pay for the convenience of owning a slicer. Whether it's making my own lunch meats, slicing vegetables, or cutting perfectly even pieces of crostini for fresh bruschetta, the slicer is a must have for the red room. I highly advocate picking one up, just like Seinfeld you'll wonder how you ever lived without it.