Bloody Mary shrimp cocktail

• frozen cooked shrimp, peeled with tails on
• prepared cocktail sauce
• tomato juice
• vodka (I used Bakon)
• celery stalks
• green olives
• fresh parsley, chopped fine

Let shrimp thaw in the refrigerator. Boil equal parts tomato juice and vodka for 5 minutes. Pour juice over the shrimp and stir in parsley, marinate for no more than 20 minutes. Drain and discard the marinade. Best served in a large Martini glass with the shrimp built on the sauce. Garnish with celery and skewered olives.

The dish: There's an old saying that says "there's and ass for every seat". No matter how outlandish a product may seem, somebody somewhere will buy it. When I first heard of Bakon vodka I wondered what type of person would buy such a product, and yet knew that I was whatever type it was. I bought it not to drink, but rather to cook with. As part of a Bloody Mary type marinade it works great without being overpowering. This is a great way to dress up an ordinary shrimp cocktail and turn it into something of a show piece. Don't be afraid to try this recipe using regular vodka, I'm sure it will work just as well. The large martini glass isn't necessary either, but it really adds to the presentation. The glass can be bought at most craft stores for under $10.

martini

• gin
• dry vermouth
• good quality olives

Fill martini glass with ice and water, set aside. In shaker, combine gin with a little vermouth to taste and shake well (don't believe the hype- you can't bruise gin) for 30 seconds. Dump ice water out of glass, strain drink into glass and garnish with olives.

The dish: Having spent a fair enough of time on both sides of the bar I've learned a few things about mixing drinks. It seems these days that any drink you strain into a martini glass deserves the fabled title, even if gin, vermouth or olives are nowhere near it. This of course is wrong and if a bartender immediately asks "gin or vodka" after you say "martini", my advice is to turn and run as the gentleman clearly doesn't know a cape cod from a vodka cranberry. There is only one martini and this is it. Make it with vodka and it's a vodkatini, with Scotch it's a rob roy, with bourbon a Manhattan. Even if you make it with gin and vermouth but then throw an onion in it, it becomes a gibson. This was made with Bombay Sapphire White, but any good quality gin will work.

Mediterranean Boboli pizza

• 1 Boboli crust
• prepared pesto
• fresh spinach, chopped finely
• pitted kalamata olives, sliced
• 1 jar of artichoke hearts, drained and chopped
• ricotta cheese

Preheat oven to 425. If you have a pizza stone leave in and make sure it gets all hot, otherwise cook it directly on the rack, but if you're wondering why pizza you make at home sucks it's because you don't have one. Meanwhile, spoon dollops of pesto and ricotta randomly on crust and cover with rest of ingredients being generous as most of this stuff is pretty good for you. Cook in hot oven for 10 minutes or until toppings are hot and crust is crispy.

The dish: There is no substitute for real New York style thin crust, so when I make pizza at home I don't even try to replicate it. Boboli makes a pretty good and very easy crust and I try to load it up with all kinds of things I would never ask the dude with the vowel-heavy name behind the counter at the local pizzeria to top one of his slices with. Themes work well, this Mediterranean one is great for loading up on veggies, but you could just as easily be non-virtuous and have a bbq chicken or meats from around the world pie.