red beans and rice

• brown rice (instant or take out works fine)
• 2 cans of small red beans, drained and rinsed
• good quality vegetable stock
• adobo
• 1 large onion, chopped
• hot peppers, chopped fine
• garlic, chopped fine
• fresh cilantro, chopped fine

Prepare rice according to package (or open the bag that your take out rice came in and read your fortune cookie). In a saucepan over a medium high heat, saute garlic and onions in a swirl of olive oil for 3-5 minutes or until just browned. Add beans and a generous pour of vegetable stock and continue to cook, reducing the flame to medium low. If the liquid cooks off, feel free to add more, but be careful not to make it too soupy. As for the peppers, go according to your taste. I used two habenaros and it was hot but not uncomfortable. If you like food more mild, reduce quantity or use a less spicy variety of pepper; if you own stock in pepto bismol, then go nuts and add as much as you like. Add the peppers and cilantro and season to taste with the adobo. Continue to cook for as long as the rice takes adding stock as needed.

The dish: If you notice that we eat a lot of beans, it's at least partly because of two unique things about me; 1. my colon is about 18 inches shorter than yours and 2. I felt younger on my 30th birthday than my 29th. You see, on my 29th birthday I was in the hospital suffering from a severe diverticulitis attack that later caused me to undergo colon resection surgery, essentially cutting about a foot and a half out of my ass (regrettably not the part that would allow me to fit into smaller pants). No matter what old wives' tale you may have heard, diverticulitis has nothing to do with nuts or seeds or corn, but rather it's a disease that's brought about by dehydration and lack of fiber. The whole episode really opened my eyes and although I'm far from the picture of perfect health I've made a few small changes like eating plenty of roughage and drinking lots of water. Needless to say I felt quite a bit younger on my 30th birthday as I wasn't towing around an IV cart (I believe I named mine Claudia when I was in the hospital). Beans are a great way to up the fiber in your diet as they are versatile and cheap- there is a recession going on you know.

black bean salad

• 4 cans of black beans, drained and rinsed
• 1 yellow pepper, seeded and diced
• 1 orange pepper, seeded and diced
• 1 cup of cherry tomatoes, halved
• fresh cilantro, chopped fine
• juice of half a lime
• good quality olive oil
• good quality balsamic vinegar

Place beans, peppers, tomatoes and cilantro in large bowl. In a separate bowl, whisk together lime juice with close to equal parts of oil and vinegar, about a quarter cup total. Use very good quality of each, you know, those bottles you got on close out (vinegar is a preserving agent, it's not going to go bad). I had some scallion oil that I used as part of the oil and it added nicely, but regular olive oil works fine. Stir whisked dressing into beans and toss to coat. Serve cold.

The dish: Beans are popular in almost every culture on the globe, and with good reason, they're plentiful and healthy, packed with protein and fiber with no fat and very few calories. Beans are a powerful weapon against high cholesterol, diabetes, diverticulitis, constipation, even cancer and a host of other health maladies. If you tend to avoid them because of their most notorious side effect, begin eating a small amount of them on a frequent basis, maybe a bite three times a day. This will help your body produce a beneficial bacteria (which is all that Beano is) that will help in dealing with the complex sugars (complex is the key- your body will burn them for energy but not store them as fat) that cause gas. Draining and rinsing is also key here; what you're doing is washing away extra sugars that cause discomfort, as well as the lions share of the sodium.